ADVERSITY - Go through it or GROW through it

Today as life returns to some semblance of normal, albeit a few restrictions, I reflect on the last 8 weeks and what I have learned, but more importantly on who I have become, and how I have grown and changed.

​Very early on in Lockdown I read this post from @findingmillie on Instagram - 

If you're not using this time to rest, reset, and prioritise your purpose and people in your life, you my friend are wasting an opportunity you may never get again, the world literally stopped and shifted for you to get your shit together."
@findingmillie

This post dramatically shifted my mindset, it helped me to let go off the frustration I was feeling about all of the exciting things that had been happening in my life that had suddenly been whisked away. It helped me to see this situation as an opportunity. 

I made a firm pact with myself that I was not going to come out of this the same person. 

This is an important lesson for life, because whether it's a global pandemic, or some personal stressful or traumatic situation,  or even just an irritating person in your life.... SHIT HAPPENS! And if you are breathing, you are going to experience adversity in your life. There are going to be people that upset you, situations that frustrate you, or daily annoyances to irritate you.

The question to ask yourself is:

AM I GOING TO GO THROUGH THIS OR GROW THROUGH THIS?

Often situations can cause great pain, but you can decide,

"I am not going to waste this pain by coming out the same!".

AS YOU HEAD BACK OUT INTO THE WORLD, THINK ABOUT HOW YOU WANT TO BE DIFFERENT... WHO IS THIS NEW IMPROVED VERSION OF YOU? GO OUT AND INTRODUCE 'THE NEW YOU' TO THE NEW WORLD....

For me, the new me is someone who keeps her peace more of the time.

I want to strive to achieve the state of serenity, that I learned about years ago in my first experiences of Yoga and meditation, and hold on to it for longer periods throughout the day.

I don’t want to let the same people upset me, the same circumstances frustrate me.

I'm determined not to allow what’s on the outside to get on the inside. I'm going to strive to not let the busy-ness that’s happening on the outside get on the inside. It can be busy on the outside, but still on the inside.

This is my challenge to myself... WOULD YOU LIKE TO JOIN ME?

In the midst of any adversity there is a place of peace inside that we can go to. Finding that place and developing the skill of going there is a massive step when it comes to building up resilience, and this is my daily goal. To me, this is now more important than what I achieve and accomplish in my day.

If I ticked many things off my to-do list, but I lived my day stressed out and strung out, that is no longer a successful day to me.

RESILIENCE : The capacity of a system, enterprise or person to maintain it's core purpose and integrity in the face of dramatically changed circumstances."
- Why things bounce back (Zolli & Healey)

​THE ULTIMATE FREEDOM!

We all know people who are calm and composed even when it is chaos around them. This is a skill we can all develop, it can be learned like any other skill, and it is worth striving for. We CAN have peace when we should be upset, we can have peace when we really should be stressed out. When we have the ability to stay calm in the midst of the storm - this is the ultimate freedom of life.

Just like in the eye of the storm, in the midst of any difficulty there is a place of peace and calm that we can go to.

If we get upset, or bent out of shape every time things don’t go our way, we can’t bring peace to that situation. And we certainly can’t deal with it in the best way. Peace is not the absence of trouble, peace is not getting rid of all our enemies, peace is not overcoming all of our challenges, paying off all of our bills....  there can be trouble and challenges all around us on the outside, but real peace is not allowing it on the inside.

STILL WATERS RUN DEEP

In the ocean, on the surface the water is always changing depending on the wind and the tide.. It can be very smooth and calm in the morning, then later in the day it can be rough and choppy, there can be 5 metre waves, where a few days ago it was just small white caps. What’s interesting is, if you go down about 30 feet deep, the water never changes, it’s as calm and still as can be. Right above it on the surface it may change a dozen times a day, but 30 feet down it never changes, it's always calm. 

That’s the way we need to be. On the surface things will always be going on… you can’t get away from all the traffic, a person that irritates you, a challenge in your relationship, a challenge in your health - that's just life. These situations will create waves up on the surface, but deep down there is a calmness. Through practice, we can find that calmness and go there anytime, in any situation.

GO DEEPER - STAY CALM - KEEP YOUR PEACE

As we head out into the world, there will be frustrations due to the rules and regulations that are now imposed on us. Whether or not we agree or disagree, this reality is with us right now. Our only option is to go with it, and stay in peace. 

Letting everything on the outside effect us means we are living a very shallow life, we’re focused on the surface, the problem is we can’t control the wind and the tide, and when we try we'll just get frustrated. We can’t control what other people do. The only thing we can control is our own attitude.  

Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it. 

Go deeper. The surface is always going to be changing, remember : as long as we are alive there is going to be something to deal with, but when we learn to go down to the deep waters, we can find this calmness, this rest. Whatever is on the surface is only temporary.... “This too shall pass”. 

Life is too short to live it offended, upset, stressed out, discouraged....

EVERYDAY IS A GIFT!
​
Every day, I challenge you to start your day by pronouncing:

“Nothing is going to move me today, nothing is going to upset me. My plans may not work out, but I can and will stay in peace”. ​​

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